Why Do I Run, Again?

...because I can!

I went out to cheer on my friends at the 3M half marathon this past Sunday. I always seem to get teary-eyed watching people out on the course, pushing themselves. It definitely moves me.

I cheered my little heart out.

I yelled for people by name - even if they were not a close friend. I know the difference hearing your name makes. I yelled for strangers. I yelled for those who were fast and I yelled for those who were slow.

"Great job, runners!"
"You're lookin' good!"
"You're almost done!"
"Keep workin'!"

One boy about 10 years old, stopped and approached me. With his most earnest voice, he asked me, "what mile am I on?" I told this young man that he was almost to mile 12, "You're almost there, Buddy! You're doing a great job!". A woman wearing a Garmin had just passed five minutes prior and told her friend that they were at mile 11.7 (loud enough for me to hear). This seemed to be enough to inspire him to keep running.

I'd never noticed how much I love the sound of feet pounding the pavement. I guess it's because my feet are usually contributing to the sound. Yesterday, it sounded melodic to me. It made want to be out on the course. I wanted my feet to be a part of the sound I was hearing.

Why do I run?

I run to be a part of something bigger than myself. I run to inspire those running with me and those watching me run. I run because I am healthy and because I can.

I will run the Austin Marathon on February 17th. It will be my second marathon. I've been wondering lately if I'm cut out for this. I had forgotten (even if only briefly) why I run. Thankfully, this weekend I remembered.

Thank you to those of you who ran the 3M...to those of you who needed me to cheer for you. As it turns out, I needed it more than you.

Page-a-Day

My calendar for Busy Women had this bit of insight for me this Saturday...

We all have cranky days. We're not bad. We just have cranky days. Enjoy them! And warn others to keep their distance.

I think Gareth might like a better warning about mine!

It was the Weekend

Occurred November 2007

For my birthday this year, I decided to drink Mexican Martinis with my best girlfriends. Birthday on Thursday, we hit the town the following Saturday night! It started off strong at the first location. Hair in place, sassy outfits, queso and guacamole...and our first drinks!


The plan was 6 Mexican Martinis at 3 locations. Only three drinks in, at the second bar, Lindsey and I begin spilling on each other...accidentally, of course. I lose track of the fact that there are actually other people at the table as the two of us begin to make fun of anyone we can think of and giggle hysterically at our own inside jokes. Obviously, we're very mature.

To make a long story short, I only made 3 1/2 - 4 drinks depending on whether you count the part that I spilled. We cut the night short...at about the point I started needing to close one eye to see anything.

I was thankful for the designated driver that night and almost fell out of my clothes on my way to bed . All in all, a good birthday celebration!...wish I had the "after" photos.

On birthdays like this one, I can't help but remember one of my brother's best EVER one-liners...

Five years ago

Me: (hungover, depressed, and ashamed of myself after one of my first drunken birthdays - looking to my brother to confirm that I'm not going to hell for this) "It's my birthday, right? I can drink whatever I want when it's my birthday. This doesn't mean I'm a bad person, right?"

John: (cool, calm, and collected...and shocked that anyone would even ask such a question) "I mean, yea. It's the weekend."

Alcohol has been a part of every birthday since. God bless John.

Why Do I Run?

...many of my friends ask themselves this question from time to time. I am always intrigued to hear their answers. Most of the time, I cannot begin to relate. Their stories can be found under "More Fun Stories" to the right.

For the most part, the people that I run with are fast (and I use the term "with" in the loosest sense of the word). They are competitive in their age groups if not overall. They take this shit seriously, and they love their sport!

I get it. I get that it's inspiring when you are good at something.

I used to play volleyball. It felt to me like I always stood out...even way back when. Asked to move to JV as a freshman in high school and practice with Varsity. Starting at my position as a sophomore, earning local and state honors. As a junior, being recruited by Top 10 colleges and universities, being invited to train at the US Olympic Center. Captain of the team my senior year, Fab 50 recruit (the blue chip of volleyball), accepted a full scholarship to The University of Texas.

Good. Great, even!

In college, I started as a freshman, played for a National Championship my sophomore year. Earned All-Big 12 honors as a junior and a senior. My teams won a Southwest Conference championship and Big 12 championship. Yes, this was truly my thing.

Sadly, my "thing" is over now. It will never be the same. Not now. Not ever.

Something that being in sport taught me is that if something is worth doing, it's worth putting time and effort into being the best.

So now, why do I run?

I run to remind myself that I am human, that I am flawed, and that I am not always the best...and that that is okay! I will never win a race. I have no chance at finishing first in my age group. My only hope is to not come in last. I am not used to this, but I find great value in it.

As part of my training, I ran 20 miles last Saturday. This was not an easy run for me as I had been out of practice for several weeks over the holidays. I did it though...even if I did not do it well. You can find my run here.

It is worth noting that I walked the last 1 1/2 miles. My pace had fallen off so much that I was actually passed by two men who were walking. Try as I might, I couldn't run any faster, so I decided to walk myself.

I asked myself "why do I run?" many times on this course, although it sounded more like, "why the hell am I doing this, again?!"

No, I am not great at running. I am not even good.

It was humbling at first to realize this, but now I embrace it. I am not ashamed that I am one of the last to finish the long runs. It may actually make me stronger. After all, I am still a runner.

There IS value in the pursuit of the challenge...even if I am not the best.

2008 - The Ocho

For me, the year 2007 had it's successes and challenges...

Finishing my masters degree in May (finally!), moving in with Gareth in July, a trip to Banff Springs, Canada and Hermosa Beach, CA, a promotion at work, my Mom being diagnosed with breast cancer, Thanksgiving in Omaha with family and "discovering" my hometown with Gareth, and a trip to Chicago for Christmas.

Life never seems to let up, so as I begin yet another year, I know I will find successes and challenges, again. They will be different, of course, but they will still help to define the person I am...and if I'm lucky, allow me to grow.

What changes do I want to make?

More home cooked meals (maybe finding inspiration from Rachel).
Less clutter in my home and office.
Making time and space in my life for fun.